Pre-Marriage Counseling (Part 4)

Pre-Marriage Counseling (Part 1)

Pre-Marriage Counseling (Part 2)

Pre-Marriage Counseling (Part 3)

Summer came and went, but circling back to this series on pre-marriage counseling.

In the final pre-marriage counseling section I discuss with the couple practical household duties, e.g., principles for household budgeting and financial wrangling, duties and balance of family life and employment, the labyrinth of all things insurance (car, renter/home, health, life, disability), etc. The number one goal is to highlight biblical wisdom and the couple’s deep need to seek and apply God’s wisdom to the milieu and circumstances of their (married) life.

If the couple is starting off their marriage with debt, I recommend Ramsey’s Total Money Makeover or Gary North’s website Deliverance from Debt. If the couple is debt-free, then I recommend something akin to Brady and Woodward’s Financial Fitness: The Offense, Defense, and Playing Field of Personal FinanceOne of the things I emphasize during this session is that the couple needs to plan accordingly for death, i.e., eliminate personal debt asap, take out life insurance policies on one another, discuss all things future and financial like retirement planning and financial investing . . . the point is to plan and prepare beforehand, so you can bless your spouse with being emotionally and financially prepared for an unexpected and untimely death.

We conclude this session with preliminary discussion on sexual fulfillment and the joys of the marriage bed, and I assign reading from Wheat & Wheat’s Intended for Pleasure. As my marriage counselor said over 12 years ago, you hold this off until the end because it is like throwing gasoline on a fire. There is typically a 5th and final meeting, during which I circle back and give advice and offer instructions regarding sexual fulfillment and the marriage bed, but typically we are down to the wire and finalizing and ironing out details and logistics for the wedding ceremony and reception. My advice is for the ceremony to be sober and short (which typically means traditional service), and the reception to be long and joyous.

 

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